the terrifying experience of buying a house…

so… my boyfriend and i – well, fiance – decided to take that next big step and buy a house together… that, in and of itself, is scary… but… we were so in love and life is beautiful and the sun shines on us everyday and unicorns and rainbows and puppy dogs and blah, blah, blah… so… we’re gonna do it!

we start figuring out the logistics… i have two kids – he has two kids… and while his kids don’t live with him full time, we still need for them to have their own rooms… we want to make sure that they always feel welcome in our home… that they have their own space… not that they are simply visitors every other weekend and a few weeks during the summer… so…. five bedrooms – that’s what we’ll need… wow… that’s going to be SOME house… but… it is what we need for our new soon-to-be blended family…

the kicker is that my kids want to stay in the same school… and i have a crazy ass custody order with my ex-husband that says i can’t move farther away from his residence… so… that really limited our search… but we found a neighborhood… and a perfect house plan… five bedrooms, a game room, a media room, and an office (because i work from home)… it is beautiful! huge, but beautiful! but omg! the price! but it is fine because it is a great neighborhood, works with the ex-husband’s restrictions, keeps the kids in their respective schools, and the house is amazing…

we’ll take it!

so… we start picking out the options… and the numbers keep adding up… but… this is our forever home… so we don’t want to skimp… we want to make sure that it is perfect… now is not the time to go cheap… we get the extended master bedroom and master closet – because we want a GRAND master bedroom… and the closet is huge – hell, it could be a sixth bedroom! we also opt for the extended back patio – because we have these visions of sitting out there listening to music, drinking wine, and loving life… we got a two and a half car garage – because he had a jeep and a motorcycle… and of course, my car… gah! everything about this house is just perfect… our life in this house is going to be perfect… amazingly perfect…

it comes time to sign the paperwork – all that financial stuff… ugh! so… my daughter accompanies me because the boyfriend – er, fiance – is busy working… so… i sign all the paperwork… i put down the earnest money… oh shit! i just realized that by signing all this myself – without him – I’M responsible for all this… *faints* but… it is fine, because we’re in love and we’re in this together… and even though i’m signing all the documents, it is really our house because once we get married, everything becomes “ours”…

yep, once we get married… so…. turns out that the whole marriage thing isn’t going to happen after all… i had a change of heart… i still loved him, but sometimes love isn’t enough… (and honestly, in retrospect, i’m not sure that the love went both ways… i don’t know if he ever loved me… but that is a whole ‘nother topic!)… but it is fine… because i’ve worked out the numbers and i can still afford the house on just my salary… i mean, it will be tight… and we can’t go out to eat anymore… and we can’t go on too many vacations… but… with this amazing house, why would we ever want to leave?!

so… relationship ended… but there’s still a new beginning… i closed on the house on december 29, 2014… just in time to ring in the new year in our beautiful – albeit empty – home… but… without the boyfriend – and his two boys – moving in… what are we going to do with those “extra” rooms?? well, the obvious choice was to make one into a guest bedroom… the other?? it became an art/craft room for me and my daughter… (mostly for her)…

i still think this house is amazing… and i’m in awe every time i walk from room to room… “i can’t believe i live here!” goes through my mind – and sometimes comes out my mouth… this is my dream home… and while it isn’t the way i expected to be living here, i can’t imagine loving it any less…

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